LIFE
FOR ONCE
I need to lie in someone's lap,
No thought of any mishap,
Adversity,
Lack of diversity,
Disharmony,
In things that haunt my mind,
Invade my thoughts constantly,
Affect each fiber of my being,
Make each cell want to scream.
But not able to
Express themselves,
Release the toxin,
Be at peace.
For once.
When it is stormy,
I want a place of tranquility,
A refuge,
Somewhere it can all go away,
Never to come back,
Never affect me,
Infect me,
Spread its cancer throughout my soul.
For once.
I just need
NOT to be the only person in the world,
With this affliction,
In this situation,
Internalizing,
Bearing,
Biding time,
Hoping it gets better.
NOT SAYING A THING
You will never hear me say
“I digging you baby”,
Because uttering those words
Takes me down a path
Where I have no control,
No assurances,
Only vulnerability.
You will never hear me say
“I really want us to take this further”,
Because the thought of rejection
Is harder to bear than the act itself.
You will never hear me say
“I’d do anything to see you smile”,
Because it comes off as weak,
Too giving,
Almost needy.
You will never hear me say
“I want to always be inside you”,
Because you may take it the wrong way,
Interpret only the sex-well,
Not seeing the spirit-well,
Not knowing of love unconditional.
You will never hear me say
“I think of you in my every waking moment”,
Because you may assume I have no life,
No independence,
Think me depraved,
Some sort of weird freak or stalker.
You will never hear me say
“I love you”,
Because it is too much to handle,
To wrap your head around,
To make your heart recognize.
You will never hear me say
Anything of this,
Even though you know,
This is what I think,
What I want to say,
What I want to act on.
REFLECTIONS
Looking at pictures of our time together,
Allowing myself to drift back,
Unraveling thoughts and deep emotion,
Recounting our every step,
Allowing myself to enjoy, re-live, re-smile.
Laughing at your silly antics,
Amazed at how you contort your face,
Unfolding such emotion,
Retaining such grace,
Alluding to so much more.
Listening to your every word,
Always eager to hear your musings,
Understanding your think-ings,
Recognizing your soul,
Appreciating the being you are.
I sit here reflecting.
Longing for a few more stolen moments,
Over coffee, lunch or dinner,
Very conscious of the possibilities in this reality,
Embracing the NOW.
Your image haunts me,
Over and over again,
Underscoring my fascination, my concern, my affection.
WHAT I FEAR
What do I fear?
Me,
You,
Us,
The possibility of someone getting hurt.
Something so seemingly perfect,
Deserves special treatment,
Placed in its own context,
Treated solely on its own merit.
No externalities,
Side issues,
Lurking matters from the past.
You know what I fear?
Losing you,
Losing me,
Losing us,
The possibility that it will never ever be the same.
The unparalleled comfort,
No need,
Greed,
Or ego to feed.
Just us,
Two human beings on a journey,
To the same place,
Along the same path,
With the same mindset,
Wanting the same things from life.
Trying to learn from what was.
Want to know what I fear?
Not ever having a friend,
Not interested in a fly-by-night,
An insincere, inconsiderate pretender,
But someone like you,
Liking and appreciating me,
In spite of my flaws,
Because of my flaws.
Seeing through all the things that make me human,
But not necessarily humane.
Seeing through the layers,
And still liking what you see.
What do I fear?
I fear what could be.
LOVE
REMEMBER LOVE
Remember love
Is reality.
When gray skies abound,
When death looms,
And only darkness is around.
Remember love
Is compromise.
When darkness strikes light,
When hope is found,
The sun rises and grabs you by surprise.
Remember love
Is everlasting.
When death separates oceans,
When peace finds it calm on sandy shores,
When hues of a red, orange sunset become midnight.
Remember love
Is life.
Babies crying,
Streetcar racing,
Online dating,
Neighbors talking
On a stoop.
Remember love
Is being.
Mourners grieving,
Hearts beating,
Lovers kissing,
Birds chirping,
Voices singing.
Remember love
Is all we are.
Remember love.
Remember love.
ONE MOMENT
One moment
Where our eyes met,
Our worlds stopped,
The earth shook,
And we knew it was right.
One moment
Where our hands touched,
Energy flowed,
Auras glowed,
And we knew this was real.
One moment
When our hearts leapt,
Sweet caress,
Lips met,
And we knew there was no escape.
One moment
When our passions grew,
Delicious desire,
Burning fire,
And we knew there was more.
One moment
Forever etched in time,
As church bells chime,
Verses rhyme,
And everything seemed too sublime.
One moment
Of cosmic pleasure,
Sweet surrender,
And we knew there was nothing better.
YOUR KISS
You underestimate your power.
The power of your touch.
The power of your warmth.
The power of your kiss.
A simple thing,
So pure,
So divine,
A simple gift,
So serene,
So sublime.
A simple gesture,
So innocent,
Yet full of guilt.
Expressing an emotion,
One that delights me,
One that overwhelms me,
One that incites me to action.
An act that brings me to tears.
Carries me close to the brink of ecstasy,
Shows me the land of bliss.
You underestimate the power of your kiss.
ON MY MIND
Hints of you.
Linger,
Flicker,
Trigger
Emotions I thought long lost, long dead.
Engaging me,
Igniting things,
Deep in the recesses of my sub-conscious,
Attacking and invading my senses,
Making me weak,
Almost making me lose control of my inner freak.
Still seeing your smile,
Imprinted on my mind,
Making me sad,
Because you can no longer be had.
Melancholy,
As this memory replays
Without my permission.
Yet no protestation,
Somehow I think I have given you an open invitation.
Visual cues
Jolting me back into our time
Wishing I could be there again
One more second,
One more minute,
Another hour
To enjoy the sight that is you,
To revel in our conversation,
Ponder the possibilities,
Plan indiscretions.
Sending my mind to a secret place,
Unbeknownst to you,
Scheming and planning,
Planning and scheming.
What next to do,
What next to say,
What not to do,
To make you go away.
Savoring every delicious moment,
Wishing I could eat it,
Bask in it,
Relive it,
Every single moment,
Of every single day.
SEX
MY SEX
My sex
Is more monumental
Than the flames
Of London Bridge,
As they crash into the Thames.
My sex
Is fiery red.
Burning,
Hot,
Deep,
Constant,
An inferno,
Inside Fergie's web.
My sex
Is not for the faint-hearted,
The thin-skinned,
The shy,
The not-so-brave,
The unable to unlock their innermost desires.
My sex is real.
My sex
Is for the free spirited.
Open minded,
Adventurous,
Unconcerned with passing out,
And coming back for more.
My sex
Is a reflection of you,
A projection of me,
A consumption of you,
An insertion from me.
All in all,
My sex is true.
My sex
Is a cosmic event,
Worthy of celebration,
Its own constellation,
Only because of you,
Only for you.
My sex
Is an erection,
An extension,
In your honor,
For universal harmony,
A multi-orgasmic symphony.
Recognize,
My sex is the shit.
My sex
Is what you make it,
What you want it to be,
What I will provide you,
If you connect with me.
HONEY DROPS
Honey drops,
Slither down your lips,
Flicker in the moonlight,
Beckon me come hither.
Taste me,
Embrace me,
Indulge of your sweet nectar.
Slow, calculated motions,
Side to side,
Left to right.
Hips firmly grasped,
Outer Walls firmly clasped,
Tongue set to action,
Body steady in its vibration.
Exciting your pearl,
Sampling your sweet apple pie,
Sweet Blueberry,
Sugary treat.
My rest,
My retreat.
Charting regions,
Far and near.
Valleys Umbilicus,
Mountains Mammarius,
Tectonic reactions,
Produce massive erections
That swiftly merge into your landscape.
Lost between the Lower Lips,
Buried in the Homely Caverns,
Of Tight Perfection,
Effortlessly reconfiguring to fit,
Made to be together,
Hours of activity,
Pure sensitivity,
Undulated sensuality.
Honey drops,
Drip from your eyes,
Run down your lips,
Cover your face in moonlight,
Unlock the gentleness of your in-between,
That embraces the tool of your captive fiend.
SWEET PEA
I hear
The hum, hum, humming of your toy.
Totally excites me.
I know what you are doing.
You’re playing with your sweet pea.
I see
In my mind’s eye.
The rhythmic motion of your hand,
Your engorged gland,
As you titillate your sweet pea.
I smell
The aroma of jasmine,
Lavender,
Daffodils,
Petunias.
Reminding me,
Of the sweet scent,
Of your sweat pea.
I feel
Curve after sexy curve,
As fingers trace each nerve.
I bow in worship,
Pay homage,
To your sweet pea.
I taste
Breakfast,
Lunch,
And Dinner.
Nothing better.
Make you shiver,
As I make a meal of your sweat pea.
I think
I’m jealous
Of that man-made artifact,
Been where I have not,
Where I want to be,
The center of your sweet pea.
I AM NOT REALLY INTO YOU
I am not really into sex,
Though I like the occasional orgasm,
By my hand,
The wand,
Or the Vaseline can.
Not really into the drama,
The trauma,
Though I like picturing you,
Riding the big cahana.
I am not really into sex.
I just like the look on your face,
As I slow down the pace,
Make your stomach tingle,
Legs tremble,
Hips swivel,
Hit your spot,
Over and over.
I am not really into sex.
I just like hearing the sounds emerge,
As you reach the verge,
Hips and clit merge,
Blood surge,
Moans become grunts,
Grunts turn into screams,
Muffled by my mouth over yours,
Enhanced by my hands on your nipples,
Waist,
Thighs,
And your booty.
Ignited by my ever-increasing member,
Making you squirm
Black-out,
Remember your maker.
I am not into sex really.
I just get off on the effect
That it has on you.